Edge of Everywhere

Are We A Threat?

Posted on: October 28, 2008

When you’re close to someone who is in a relationship, their partner can end up feeling jealous of you. What if that person and their partner are sexual and you happen to be asexual? Does that change anything?

In this situation, asexuals have the ability to play the “harmless amoeba” card and let the jealous partner feel assured that we are not a “threat” to their relationship because of our lack of sexual attraction/desire. However, I am not entirely comfortable with this, because it somehow implies that in a way, non-sexual relationships “don’t count.”

So what I’m trying to figure out is, how can we assert the importance and value of our close relationships with sexual people without being seen as a threat to their partners? How can we fit comfortably in each other’s lives?

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2 Responses to "Are We A Threat?"

Outside the asexual community people talk about this from time to time. Here’s a topic I heard mentioned once. (And I do mean once.)
“http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14287231”
“When Friendship becomes an emotional affair”

When you’re close to someone who is in a relationship, their partner can end up feeling jealous of you. What if that person and their partner are sexual and you happen to be asexual? Does that change anything?

I don’t know how it would be different if I were sexual, but from my experience, I’d say no. Even though I wasn’t at all a “threat” in that way, there’s still the issue of emotional jealousy. Communication is really important, though it can often be the most difficult solution… It’s uncomfortable to be open to the point of vulnerability, whether it’s platonic or romantic.

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